


3 in the morning

by boywholived



Series: marauders era oneshots [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Light Angst, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Self-Indulgent, The Marauders - Freeform, cant believe thats a tag, dorlene, v good friendship vibes, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:40:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25586827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boywholived/pseuds/boywholived
Summary: But then he looks around at his friends, Sirius with his hair tied in a loose ponytail, huddled under Remus's arm, laughing at something Dorcas is saying and holding a glass in his hand. Remus, with his sweater wrapped tightly around him, holding Sirius and having a nice discussion with Lily about something he can't understand. Peter, sitting on the ground, covered in a blanket next to Dorcas and Marlene, smiling wide with his eyes sparkling and his feet resting on Marlene's lap.There's the girls who really only became their friends this year, but managed to fit into the group so well it's hard to imagine Hogwarts without them. James thinks of how they cheered when Dorcas and Marlene made it official and how they all spent the night by the lake on their last day of exams. He thinks of Lily Evans with her red hair and her bright laugh that always manages to cheer Remus up.He looks at these people and thinks, maybe this is what home is.
Relationships: Marlene McKinnon/Dorcas Meadowes, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: marauders era oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1854523
Comments: 4
Kudos: 26





	3 in the morning

**Author's Note:**

> right so. this is the most self indulgent thing i have ever written but it's also one of my favorite pieces of writing that i've done so that's cool. 
> 
> i started this as a big Fuck You to the marauders writers who destroyed Peter's character or made him a background character when he is so much More. anyways the fic ended up as 6.4k of me making all of them have a good fucking time bc they deserve that much.
> 
> i have loads more ideas for marauder's era oneshots so if u like this, then u might like the others. 
> 
> (this does have hints of jily, because duh, but i didn't tag as a relationship bc like. its just james being james.) 
> 
> anyways hope u enjoy! and sorry if the grammar is shit or there are spelling mistakes, my brain is sort of fried and i only read this over like. twice. pls excuse any mistakes:)

It's about to be 3 in the morning on a summer night at the Potters. It's the last summer night before Hogwarts that they'll ever have, to be exact. (they being the marauders of course.) 

James Potter is lying in his bed thinking about this as he stares up at the ceiling. The only sounds are the steadiness of Peter's loud breathing and the occasional noise from where Sirius turns in Remus's arms. He's been planning this night for a while and is just waiting for the perfect opportunity to wake his friends up. 

He's always hated endings, hated change. He wants things to stay the same, he wants to go to Hogwarts every year and have the time of his life with his best mates. He doesn't want to have to think about the war or all the deaths that have been happening lately. He can tell his friends feel the same, if not about the change then about the war. 

Sirius is always quiet and Remus seems to snap a lot more than usual. The pair were constantly sneaking out of the dorm last year to the astronomy tower, talking about stuff they wanted to keep separate from the others. And James understands that. He does. They are brothers and they always will be but Remus and Sirius have that bond no one has been able to decipher just yet. 

At least they’re together now, it was complete hell when they weren’t. He and Peter were constantly stuck in between their stares filled with longing and unspoken words. Finally, James took matters into his own hands and locked them in a cupboard until they managed to fix their shit. They both came out 30 minutes later, looking more disheveled than before, but they were holding hands and they were happy. 

(Sirius made tons of jokes about coming out of the closet and Remus smacked him with a book every time.)

Peter’s anxiety had always been bad, but it seems so much worse lately. He sticks it out and acts like nothing is wrong because if Peter is anything he’s stubborn, but they’re getting worried. During the school year, he was constantly on edge and was always the first out of the four to read the paper. He would never sleep until they had to quite literally drag him up the stairs and into bed, Sirius threatening to throw him off the tower if he didn’t sleep. 

Something had happened over the past few weeks and Peter had yet to tell them what was wrong. He didn’t want to push, so he didn’t ask but seeing his friend in a constant state of misery was starting to scare him. 

James is handling this as best he could. He’d always been the friend to crack a joke and lighten the mood, so he felt it was his responsibility to be there for his friends. He hates seeing them like this, like shells of who they were, but there’s nothing he can do. He thinks that what he hates the most, feeling so useless. 

James feels scared that everything is falling apart way too fast and he hates it, he hates it so much. This is their last summer before their last year ever at Hogwarts and it shouldn’t be like this. It should be happy and nostalgic, all bright smiles and hopeful faces at what comes next. Instead, their faces are shadowed and an air of darkness seems to have settled over the whole group. 

But James is nothing if not hopeful and he devised a plan a few weeks ago, with the help of Lily Evans, a girl with fiery red hair that’s stolen his heart but he’ll be damned if he admits that to anyone out loud. They managed to meet up alone, at some sort of muggle cafe she had owled to him about. They spent the afternoon figuring out a way to cheer up their friends and James had left feeling as if he had actually done something, a feeling he hadn’t had in a long time. 

And now the day, or rather night is finally here. It’s almost 3 in the morning and James Potter is getting out of his bed to wake up his best friends. 

He decides on Sirius and Remus first, considering Peter has looked extra tired these past few days plus he’s also a very heavy sleeper and would take the longest to wake up. He feels kind of bad, shaking his friends awake but it's for a good cause and he knows they’ll enjoy it once they manage to leave. 

“Sirius!” He says, padding over to the bed and touching Sirius’s shoulder lightly. He does nothing, just mumbles a bit before turning and burying his face in Remus’s shoulder. James can’t help but melt a little bit. He wishes he had one of those muggle cameras Lily was always talking about, the ones which make the photos stay still. There’s something so peaceful about this moment, seeing Remus holding Sirius and them being so comfortable with each other, finally, after so long, and he sort of wishes it could stay like this forever. 

But plans are plans. 

“SIRIUS.” He says, louder this time, grabbing a pillow from his own bed and smacking his best friend with it repeatedly. “REMUS. GET UP.”

He’s not even shouting, just talking in a super loud voice and Sirius still decides to kick his leg out and whack him in the shin. “Shut the fuck up Prongs, my god.” 

James takes this as an opportunity to grab the blankets and yank them out from on top of him, taking them off Remus too. Sirius is fully awake now and is glaring at James with a ferociousness that has him quite scared if he’s being honest. “Wake Moony up as well, we’re going out.” 

Sirius sits up shaking out his hair and yawning. “What the bloody- James, mate it’s still dark outside.”

“Yes, Padfoot, I know this, but I promised Evans we wouldn’t be late so could you just get dressed and wake up your boyfriend?”

Sirius Black learned long ago just to go along with whatever crazy idea James was having at the moment, so he just nods and goes to wake up Remus. Smiling at the way Sirius wakes up Moony, running hands through his hair and speaking softly, James turns his attention back to the remaining marauder. Peter is still sleeping peacefully, blissfully unaware of the sounds of Remus and Sirius getting up and pulling on their clothes with Remus grumbling about “bloody 3 in the fucking morning” and “James you’re a twat I hate you” while trying to steal his jumper back from Sirius. 

He considers leaving Peter, not to leave him out but because Peter looks exhausted. James can’t quite put his finger on what might be causing such tiredness all the time. He has bags under his eyes and his hands are clenched around his blanket as if it might be stolen away from him. And he deserves sleep, but he also deserves to be with his friends so James goes and shakes him awake anyway. 

Nothing happens and all Peter does is roll over and wave a hand in the air, murmuring something about letters and needing to owl mum. James glances over at the other boys who have come to join him by Peter’s bedside. Sirius suggested to just grab a glass of water from the kitchen and dump it on his head (it works during exam weeks when Peter stayed up till the dead hours of the morning and slept so deeply that ice water was the only way.) Remus shot down this idea, pointing out that James woke them up nicely enough, so they should offer Peter the same courtesy. 

“Yeah, if you call shouting in your face common courtesy,” Sirius grumbles. Remus just smiles slightly and pulls the boy closer to him, kissing the top of his head. Sirius immediately softens, the feel of being close to Remus seems to calm him down. “So what do you propose Prongs, this is your plan after all.” 

James groans. “Listen I didn’t think this far, I just need to get you lot out of here as fast as possible.”

Turns out, they didn’t need to use some elaborate strategy to wake their friend. He shoots up out of nowhere, startling the boys and causing James to shriek.

Sirius immediately starts destroying James for screaming like a house-elf and James starts arguing about Pete startling him until Remus snaps at them both to hush it. He doesn’t say anything, just angles his head slightly towards Peter, who’s trembling, with his knees up to his chest and his arms curled around them. He looks as if he’s trying to cave in on himself. 

“Wormy?” Sirius asks, surprisingly gentle. 

The blond doesn’t answer and instead squeezes his eyes shut and takes a deep breath. He repeats the action a few times but says nothing. 

“Hey, Pete,” Remus says, sitting gently on the bed next to Peter. He lifts his hand as if to go comfort him but decides against it and lets his hand drop back down to the blanket. “Pete, what’s wrong?”

Peter finally looks at the 3 boys, worried faces staring right back at him. He shakes his head a few times before uncurling himself and stretching his legs out. “Nothing, nothing’s wrong.”

They all look at each other. “It didn’t look like nothing-” Sirius starts. 

“I don’t want to talk about it Pads, can we drop it?” Peter’s eyes are pleading. “Please?”

James sighs, speaking for the first time since Peter woke up. “Sure, but you’re explaining this later, and I don’t want to hear it-” He holds a finger up as Pete’s mouth opens to argue. “You are telling us and that’s final. Now get dressed, we’re going out.”

Peter stares at him. “Prongs, mate it’s-”

“Still dark out, around 3 in the morning, we’ve established that already,” Remus finishes, an exasperated smile on his face. “James still hasn’t explained anything and knowing him, he probably won’t until we’ve reached our destination.”

He absorbs this information and seems to decide to just go along with it, which in James’s opinion is a good plan. 

They all sit on their beds and make small talk until Peter is ready, then it’s just James dragging the boys out with hushed whispers and jumping every time they hear a noise. Peter manages to fall at least 3 times which has Sirius yelling at him and Remus smacks them both on the back of the head because their yelled whispers really aren’t as quiet as they think. 

It's 3 in the morning, (not so much anymore) and James Potter is leading his friends out of his house with the subtleness of troll at Hogwarts. They manage to make it out, somehow. Remus says something about being watched by a guardian angel because there’s no way in hell Euphemia Potter didn’t hear Sirius stomping all over the place. Sirius gasps at this, a touch too loudly and a light turns on in the house. 

Everyone freezes and then it seems as if the three boys had the same idea because suddenly Remus Lupin is standing alone in the moonlight with a stag, a rat, and a big shaggy black dog. He sighs, and simply moves to crouch behind a bush as any sane person would do. After a few, the light turns off and his friends come back. The werewolf doesn’t say anything just flips all of them off and spins around toward their original trail. 

Peter starts laughing once they get down about halfway through the forest next to the Potter’s house. The rest join in after a beat and James starts running and it's almost as if they can just forget all their worries as they run laughing and screaming through a forest. The wind rushes through their hair and it sends them flying and shouting about legacy and brotherhood and friendship, and James feels as if a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. It’s not perfect, but it’s something. 

After a few twists and turns, they make it to their destination. It’s a clearing by the beach, sort of hidden in the forest but in plain view of the ocean and the houses surrounding it. James smiles when he sees that the girls are already set up, they’ve got a fire going and logs placed around it as well. He turns and starts walking backward, spreading his arms wide and declaring: “Boys, welcome to the best night of your lives.”

Sirius raises his eyebrows. “Well I haven’t a clue what’s happening but I’m pretty sure nothing can defeat the prank in 75, involving the giant squid and some howlers-”

“Or the first night Sirius and I said I love you, that was pretty great too,” Remus adds, walking forward with his hands in his pockets and smiling at the sight of Lily. 

“I would also like to add that the night after Lily first rejected James was high up there as well,” Peter smirks. “There were many tears, it was very fun maybe I should tell you all about it-”

“I hate you all,” James says loudly, drowning out anything Peter is saying. “Now come on, it’s time for some fun.” 

He makes his way over to the girls and greets them all with a smile and firewhiskey he smuggled in his jacket. He feels at home, which is strange considering that he just left his home 10 minutes ago.

But then he looks around at his friends, Sirius with his hair tied in a loose ponytail, huddled under Remus's arm, laughing at something Dorcas is saying and holding a glass in his hand. Remus, with his jumper, wrapped tightly around him, holding Sirius and having a nice discussion with Lily about something he can't understand. Peter, sitting on the ground, covered in a blanket next to Dorcas and Marlene, smiling wide with his eyes sparkling and his feet resting on Marlene's lap. 

There are the girls who really only became their friends this year, but managed to fit into the group so well it's hard to imagine Hogwarts without them. James thinks of how they cheered when Dorcas and Marlene made it official and how they all spent the night by the lake on their last day of exams. He thinks of Lily Evans with her red hair and her bright laugh that always manages to cheer Remus up. 

He looks at these people and thinks, maybe this is what home is. 

•

An hour later, everyone is sufficiently drunk and they've all managed to avoid the logs completely and have chosen the hard ground instead. 

He realizes that Mary isn't here, but when he asks Peter about it all he gets is a shrug. The boy looks over to Lily and Marlene and they seem to have some sort of silent conversation involving a lot of head shakes and sad smiles. Peter nods at this, apparently having understood something from this and that's the end of it.

There's some music playing, something from Lily's radio. It's muggle music that James has never heard before but he likes it and everyone else does too. The fire died down a bit but it's okay because it's getting warmer and he doesn't even realize the time. 

It's silent for a little bit longer until Dorcas gets up and announces that it's time to dance. She goes and switches the song to something fast and pulls up Marlene and Lily to dance with her. They start twirling and laughing, and Lily's hair is lit up by the fire and her eyes are bright and full of light and James needs to stop staring but he can't, she's so perfect and he wishes he could tell her and-

"Prongs, mate, ready to dance?" Sirius laughs from his side of the fire, a mischievous glint in his eye. He saw him watching Lily. "The girls seem to be having fun, don't they?"

James flips him off without a word and goes over to Peter. The boy has been acting weird all night and it's time he fixes that. 

"Come on Pete, let's do this," He says, stretching out a hand in invitation. 

Peter looks at him hesitantly and in his eyes, James sees that timid boy from the train in their first year at Hogwarts. It brings a rush of memories back to James, pulling their first-ever prank on Filch, plotting into the late nights about where Remus goes every month, annoying Evans, and falling asleep on the floor of their dorm. Things were much simpler back then, but James wouldn't change what they have now for anything. 

After a few seconds, Peter grabs the outstretched hand and pulls himself up with a grin. They start swinging back and forth, not even dancing just moving along with the beat. Sirius and Remus join soon enough and then it's the four of them dancing and yelling out random lyrics as they recognize them. Or at least, Peter and Remus are, the other two are just laughing at their friends. 

They merge with the girls and suddenly Peter is dancing with Marlene, twirling her and pulling her along into an elaborate dance that has her screaming into his shoulder. Dorcas has joined Remus and Sirius, she's holding their hands and she's spinning them round and round, catching them as they fall into her arms. 

Then Lily is in front of him, a grin on her face that's strikingly similar to something James had seen on Remus's face countless times. She grabs his hands and starts dancing, laughing as James mixes up the steps. His heart is fluttering from the feel of her hand in his and it hits him. He's in love with Lily Evans. He can hear Padfoot in his ear, laughing at him and telling him of course he is, and James is so happy it's unbelievable. 

It's 4 in the morning and James Potter is dancing with Lily Evans as their friends twirl all around them. 

It’s peaceful and it’s chaos all at once. Then again, when is it not with these people? 

Someone suggests the idea of the ocean, he’s not completely sure who but he loves the idea. Marlene is the first to voice her agreement, running towards the water with her girlfriend in tow. The rest of the group soon follows, and soon enough they’re all completely soaked, big wide grins on their face and for a few moments, it feels like nothing’s wrong. 

Sirius is in the middle of a splash fight with Peter, who’s shrieking and ducking in between bodies to avoid the water. Sirius is running after him and with one giant leap, he manages to drag Peter down into the water with him. They surface, dripping wet, arms around each other as they cheer. Lily is laughing at them and she jumps on James’s back, declaring a piggyback war. Peter agrees to be the referee and keeps fake whistling every time Marlene slips off Dorcas. 

After a while, they trod back to the campfire to realize that the fire’s fully gone out. Everyone sort of stands around staring at it until Peter sighs and walks over to the pile of wood that’s gathered in the corner. He brings it back to the center and starts doing something weird with the wood and a thin stick. He doesn’t seem to realize that everyone is watching him until he turns around. 

“Don’t tell me none of you know how to start a fire?” He asks incredulously as if this is common knowledge. 

“Well we normally use magic for this sort of thing Wormy,” James says, moving and sitting on the log nearest to him. “Seeing as we’re wizards and all.”

He rolls his eyes. “Yes, I know that James, but aren’t we all underage? We can’t use magic outside of school?”

“Dorcas and Lily can, they’re both 17,” Marlene speaks up, a grin appearing on her face. 

Peter stares. “How come you’re telling me this now?”

She shrugs. 

“You could’ve told me before I started trying to start the fire the muggle way like an idiot, Merlin I hate you all,” He grumbles, slouching next to James and crossing his arms. 

“Well you looked like you were having fun, Pete,” Lily says innocently, lighting the fire with a quick wave of her wand, and a spell muttered under her breath. 

Dorcas follows, using her magic to dry everyone’s clothes off and casting a warming charm over the area. They all come and sit down around the fire again, Marlene pulling out another bottle of firewhiskey from underneath a rock. James doesn’t know where that came from but he isn’t complaining. 

Things go quiet again, loud laughs, and shouting turning to hushed whispers and quiet giggles as the night goes on. They’re getting tired, but they’re happy and it looks like James achieved his goal. He turns to tell Lily this, but as he does, he spots Peter. The boy isn’t speaking to anyone, staring at the fire with a sort of empty look on his face. It’s a startling contrast to when they were in the ocean, and James isn’t sure what to do. 

He does know that he can’t do this, whatever he’s doing, alone, so he catches Sirius’s attention by throwing a rock and hitting him on the shoulder. Once Sirius turns to him, he gestures towards Peter. Nothing more needs to be done. 

“Alright,” Sirius announces, drawing the gaze of everyone around the fire. “It’s time for a Marauders meeting.”

The girls just sigh, going back to their conversations and choosing to ignore whatever the boys are doing now. Remus says nothing, but he’s spotted Peter and has probably figured out what’s going on. The pair go and sit in the sand by the ocean, dipping their feet into the water. James gets up and walks over, glancing back at Peter to make sure he’s following. 

Once they’re all sitting together, in a sort of half-circle thing with Sirius and Remus at each side of the other two boys, James doesn’t even hesitate before saying: “Okay, Wormy, spit it out.”

Peter just looks at him. “Spit.. spit what out exactly?”

“Why you’ve been acting all weird.”

“I haven’t been acting weird.” 

“Yes, you have.”

“No I haven’t, you’re weird.”

“I’m not weird, you’re acting weird.”

“Alright enough,” Remus cuts in. “Pete, something is definitely up, no point in trying to hide that now. James shut the fuck up.” 

“I wasn’t even doing anything wrong!” James protests, throwing his hands in the air. 

“Prongs I love you and all, but you’re always doing something wrong,” Sirius says. 

“You-” James turns on the other boy now, but Peter shuts them both up by tossing sand in their faces.

The pair spend the next few minutes dramatically trying to get sand out of their mouth and hair while Remus smiles and ignores their pleas asking him to help. When they’ve finally managed to get rid of most of the sand, they all turn their attention on Peter. He isn’t looking at any of them, playing with his shoelaces instead. None of them say a word, giving Pete a chance to collect his thoughts. 

“So I might have been acting weird,” He begins. 

“I knew it!” James shouts triumphantly, earning a slap upside the head from Sirius and a few weird stares from the girls.

After grinning at James, Peter continues. “Well during the school year I just- I was scared, you know? All of my friends back home are muggles obviously, and some of the attacks have been near my hometown and I was so so scared that one morning I would open the paper to find news about my family or someone I knew found dead.”

“I never really slept and I didn’t want to tell any of you, because you all had your own shit to deal with. I didn’t wanna make it any worse and don’t look at me like that you lot would’ve done the exact same thing. Then we just sort of went home and everything was fine. Unt- until, um, about 2 weeks ago. Right after we got to James’ house.” 

He stops at this and takes a deep breath. His hands start shaking and he runs them through his hair to try and get them to stop, James guesses. Worry starts to creep in, and he grabs Peter’s wrist to stop him. He glances at the other boys and sees expressions that probably mirror his own staring back at them. James slowly drops Peter’s wrist but holds onto his shoulder instead. 

“We’re here,” He says, shaking his shoulder a bit so Peter looks him in the eyes. “We’re here.” 

He seems to calm down at this. James removes his hand and nods at the boy to continue. 

“Um, so you guys know that friend I would always tell you about?” He asks, glancing around at the group. “The muggle girl, Rosalie?”

James actually does remember her, she’s sort of like Peter’s platonic soulmate. Or at least, that’s what he thinks given everything Peter has told them about her. Sirius and Remus nod at this, and James does the same. He wonders what’s happened. He hopes it isn’t something bad. 

“Well she- she died,” Peter says softly. His voice breaks on the last word and his eyes start to fill up with tears. “Not Death Eaters or anything, just a fucking drunk driver. She died in a car accident. Mum owled me about it.”

Remus gasps, and Sirius just looks incredibly sad. James has gone a bit numb. He doesn’t know exactly what Peter is going through, but he’s his best friend. They know everything about each other, he’s going to feel like this because Peter is breaking apart and so is he. 

“It was a quick death, according to Mum,” Peter smiles sadly, wiping away his tears. “Died on impact, she didn’t feel a thing. I guess that’s good.”

James doesn’t know what to say, so he says nothing. He just draws Peter into a hug. His friend starts crying now, he can feel the tears on his shoulder. “I’m so sorry Pete, I’m so sorry.”

The other two boys join in and it's just a warm circle of arms and tears, trying to find a way to make their best friend feel a little bit better. 

They stay like that for a bit, before Peter sniffles and pulls away a bit. They assume their normal positions, but everyone is a bit closer and their legs are sort of all tangled together.

“Thing is, I didn’t even cry or anything when I found out,” Peter says. “I just felt hollow, like it wasn’t real. I had just spoken to Rose, we burnt the tea because she kept getting distracted and playing with the cat. Mum got mad so we just ran out the door and went out to her favorite bookstore. She found so many books she wanted and said she would save up to get them and send them to me while I was at school. She can’t be dead because she has to send me books and it’s not fair because I can’t do anything without her and she was so happy all the time and-”

Tears are streaming down his face now and he’s full-on shaking. Remus looks at James. “We should head back to your place, I think that’ll make things a lot easier.”

James nods, wrapping his arm around Peter and helping him up. They head back to the campfire and quickly say their goodbyes, promising to write one last time and they’ll see them back at school. Lily notices Peter and looks like she’s about to ask, but sees their expressions and decides not to. 

•

It's around 6 in the morning now, it's light outside and the Marauders are heading back home for a much-needed talk about feelings and all things emotional. James is feeling extremely guilty for not having asked Peter what was wrong earlier. He knew something was wrong, but he never acted on it and it makes him feel like a horrible friend. He knows, logically, that he is not a horrible friend, he is actually quite a good friend but it doesn’t do anything to rid himself of the guilt overtaking his mind right now. He isn’t sure if Remus and Sirius are feeling just as bad as he is, but after one look at them, he can tell they’re feeling bad as well. 

Remus keeps looking over at Peter’s back as he leads them back to the house. He keeps opening his mouth to say something, but deciding against it and looking at Sirius for help. Sirius has his mouth set in a grim line and his fists are clenched. That’s how Sirius handles his emotions, he gets angry. James can see his best friend is trying to contain those feelings of anger at the world for Peter’s sake. 

Before long, they make it back to the house, and they all sort of stop a few steps away from the opening in the forest that leads to his house. He’d been looking at his feet and hadn’t realized they’d stopped, bumping into Sirius with an “oomph!”, grabbing onto his shoulder to steady himself. 

“What did we stop for?” James complains, looking around at the group. They’re all looking at him with expectant looks on their faces and he can’t figure out why. 

“James, what time does your mum get up on Saturdays?” Remus asks, after a beat of waiting for James to say something. 

“I dunno, why- oh.” 

“Yeah, oh,” Sirius agrees. “We have to make sure Mum doesn’t catch us sneaking back in smelling like firewhiskey and the ocean, otherwise we’ll be murdered.”

“Right,” James says, racking his brain to try and remember what his mother’s Saturday morning routine is. It’s not as if he’s ever paid attention to that, he’s always up before her anyway. Most of the time he’s already sitting at the dinner table writing letters or reading one of his many quidditch books by the time she gets downstairs. 

“Oh take your time,” Peter says lightly, sarcasm clear in his voice. “It’s not as if the sun is rising or anything.” 

“Shut up Wormy, this is hard and anyways why aren’t we asking Sirius?” He protests, waving a hand in the general direction of his long-haired friend. “He lives here too.” 

Sirius opens his mouth to say something to this but is interrupted by the opening of the front door. They all freeze for a moment before dropping down to their stomachs on the ground. James thinks this is a bit dramatic, considering they’re in the forest and it’s not like his mum will be taking a stroll through here this early in the morning. The opening they were standing in isn’t even visible from the front door, and he says as much while trying to wiggle his way closer to his house. 

“I hate to say this, but Prongs is right,” Peter’s voice rings out from behind a bush. He comes into view a second later, brushing dirt off his clothes. “Your mum probably just went out for a walk, let’s hope Mr. Potter is still asleep, and use this time to sneak back in now.”

They all agree on this, and with a surprising amount of stealth, they begin to make their way back to the Potter residence. There’s a brief moment of panic where they’re not sure if the door will be locked or not, but that’s quickly resolved when Sirius states he didn’t see her lock the door. Thankfully, he’s right and the door swings open. 

Remus throws out the idea of taking off their shoes before going in as to make less noise, and since Remus is usually the one with the smartest ideas, they all do as he says then step into the house. Things go smoothly from there and the moment they make it into James’s room, the door is shut and they begin to change back into their pajamas. Once they’re all settled, James suggests the idea of sitting on the floor for “maximum friendship vibes.” (“What the fuck does that even mean, Prongs?” “Look I don’t know Wormy but we’re sitting on the floor.”)

It takes a few minutes, but eventually, they’re all settled in. Each of them has their own individual blankets, except that sort of goes out the window considering those same blankets are now covering all of them. They’re sitting in the space between Peter and James’s bed. Remus and Sirius are sitting together in front of his bed, and Remus makes an offhand comment about the amount of shit underneath the bed but he chooses to ignore that. He and Pete are sitting directly across from the other two and this setup is so familiar it reminds him of First Year. 

A few moments of silence go by, with the three boys looking expectantly at Peter who is twisting his hands through the blanket and refusing to meet their eyes. James isn’t exactly sure how to go about this, he knows nothing about what to do when his best friend loses his platonic soulmate. This has James thinking about what would happen if he lost Sirius or if Sirius lost him and the thought scares him so much that he shoves it out of his brain and vows never to think like that again. 

It’s Remus who speaks first. “Wormtail?” 

Peter looks up at this, glancing ‘round at the rest of them. He seems to realize that they’re waiting for him to talk, to say something about Rosalie. His mouth is set and his eyes are hard, determined when he finally starts. 

“It was over Christmas break, that was our last one together. We were making plans to go on this trip over the summer, something about a train that takes you all over Europe. She was so excited, she’d been writing to me about it nonstop the entire term. We’d spend the days walking in the snow and visiting the bookstore, we’d sometimes go see a film if there was anything interesting. The day I left, I’d given her a hug like it was any other day because it was, I was supposed to see her again,” Peter says all of this in a rush, slow enough so the boys can understand but he looks like he’s about to break any second. 

“And I did, but she had to go on a last-minute trip right after I got home, so I only spent a few days with her before she left. That was a normal day, we didn’t do anything special and then she was off. We still spoke, obviously. We talked on the phone a lot, and I sent letters. Everything was fine, and I came here, to your house,” He directs this last bit at James, who is starting to tear up because he never got the chance to meet Rosalie and Pete always said they would love her. “Anyway, yeah, it was about 2 days after that the letter from Mum came. With the news. And that was it, I guess.” 

Peter seems to crack at the end of this, and tears start spilling down his face. James almost cries too, but he has to be strong and he has to make sure his friend is okay. He wraps an arm around the smaller boy’s shoulders, rubbing his back as Peter’s tears soak his shirt. 

“It’s not fair,” He’s whispering and James hears his heartbreak in half. “It’s not fair, why did it have to be her, this isn’t fair.” 

They sit like that for a little bit longer, with Remus and Sirius looking at them with equally pained faces. They hate seeing their friend like this, so broken and so helpless. When Peter finally manages to stop the tears, wiping his eyes and smiling sadly up at James as he stays right by his side. 

“I’m so sorry mate,” Sirius says, squeezing Peter’s knee. “I know that’s useless and doesn’t help, but I’m so fucking sorry.” 

“I wish we could’ve met her,” Remus says softly. “From everything you told us about her, she sounded bloody amazing.” 

Peter laughed, his eyes dimming as he remembers his friend. “Yeah, yeah she was my favorite.” 

“I’m not exactly sure if this will help, but do you want to tell us some more stories about her?” James suggests. He’s not exactly sure what else to do and he hates feeling so helpless.

“I’m pretty sure I’ve told them all by now,” Peter says. “But maybe some other time, when it’s not so-” 

“Fresh,” He finishes for him. “Right, that’s fine Pete, whatever you need.”

“We could always talk about James finally realizing he’s in love with Evans now,” Sirius says, a twinkle in his eye. “Couldn’t keep your eyes off her at the fire, could you Prongsie?”

“Are our minds connected?” James demands because now he’s actually curious. “That was meant to be my big announcement. How did you figure it out?”

“Big announcement? You’ve been in love with her for years, how is this an announcement?” Remus says, just as Sirius answers his question. “Merlin, I hope not. Sharing a mind with you would be hell.” 

“Hey!” He protests. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“To be fair mate, he’s got a point,” Peter says next to him, giving him a sympathetic look. 

“Which ‘he’ are you referring to, Moony or Pads?” 

Peter thinks for a moment, before shrugging. “Both.” 

At this, James picks up the pillow from behind him and lobs it at his head. This results in a shout from Peter, who throws the pillow back at him. James easily deflects and sends the pillow flying toward Remus. Before anyone can figure out exactly what’s happening, pillows are flying everywhere and there’s shouting, scrambling to hide under the blankets and a sense of chaos that can only ever be associated with the Marauders. 

It’s almost 7 in the morning and James Potter is in the middle of an all-out pillow war with his best mates. Things aren’t perfect, but for now, in this moment, they’re good. And that’s what matters.

**Author's Note:**

> cry over the marauders with me, i deserve it<3  
> tumblr: jsctens  
> instagram: evclynsheart


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